Seriously, if you only knew the sacrifices I make for this blog, and your entertainment! Here I am, sitting in 1st Class where they've already offered me intoxicants. Then they gave me a hot towel that nearly scalded me. Now they're trying to make me fat by bringing out assorted nuts, which will later be followed by a 3 course meal (Appetiser of chilled lime shrimp and seared scallop, southwest vegetable salad and roast yellow pepper soup. Second course of mixed green salad. Main course selection between Gemelli Pasta with cheese sauce, radicchio, spinach and shiitake mushrooms, or Tender Filet of Beef with blue cheese sauce, lyonnaise potatoes and sautéed haricots veers, or Pan-Seared Chicken Breast with citrus salad, mashed potatoes and grilled asparagus with roasted garlic, or Chilled Deli Plate of roasted beef, smoked salmon, defiled egg, grilled zucchini, yellow squash and capers.) That is all followed by dessert (selection of cheeses with fresh fruit, vanilla ice cream sundae or chocolate cake.) To say nothing of the "light snack" they serve pre-arrival (roasted chicken sandwich with pesto sauce, provolone cheese and tomato and cucumber salad or cold salad plate with smoked salmon and potato cucumber salad, served with breadsticks and fresh fruit.). All of that is, of. Course served on real china with actual cutlery, which was so chilled I nearly lost a finger to freezer burn, and a linen table cloth. And the cheek! They steal away my Diet Coke and bring me a fresh one before I'm empty!
Then, once I've finished my food, I'm going to have to put my seat into full recline and sleep, since my flight doesn't get into JFK til 8.30pm and the next flight to Salt Lake doesn't leave til 7 something in the morning. So I'll be up all night at the airport.
Yes, I tell you, I seriously sacrifice myself on the alter to the travel gods for your benefit!
Showing posts with label Arrived. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Arrived. Show all posts
Monday, 8 August 2011
The Sacrifices I Make
Saturday, 2 July 2011
Hello Luggage!
Some day scientists are going to find the Sapient Pear Wood from which The Luggage is made. I'm seriously looking forward to that. The most amazing luggage ever. Not only does it never get lost (it follows you around on hundreds of little legs) and have a seemingly infinite amount of room inside (which is apparently exempt from weight restrictions, in addition to the space paradox), but it actually does your laundry for you! Either that, or it has a direct conduit to a dry-cleaners. Either way, I want one! But until then, I'll have to make due with this:
Hey, at least it's here! (Actually, it beat me by 2 days.)
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